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Lingerie shop assistants give me the creeps! Not all of them, to be fair… but I do seem to have run into more than my fair share of the grumpy, tight-lipped disapproving ones that have left me feeling inadequate and that I am not worthy of being included in their special, elite lingerie-wearing world.
The lingerie shop assistant, who swoops on you as soon as you step in the door, is a prime example. You know the one… she then makes it her own personal business to stalk you as you are obviously potential shop-lifter material. You can’t relax and try on lingerie because there she is again… poking her nose over the door or through the curtain like she’s some sort of top secret agent for the FBI. You hurriedly pick one or two lingerie pieces and buy them just to get the hell out of there and as you run screaming from her clutches, you promise never to return to her lingerie shop even if it was the last lingerie shop in town!
Be weary of the lingerie shop assistant who likes to man-handle you. She’s the one who insists on measuring you up, no matter how much you swear you already know what bra size you are. She’s from the ‘old school’ style of lingerie shop where she is the expert and madam needs to be told (by her) what suits and what doesn’t. She then proceeds to bring in these dictated lingerie samples one by one and watches over her tortoise-shell specs while you try them on under her supposed professional guidance.
Having said that… some lingerie shop assistants in the modern specialist boutique lingerie shops are more than willing, and incredibly able, in finding you that perfect little lingerie number. That, after all, is their job. It’s what they do; they’re trained for it… so you may as well use them. If it’s wedding night lingerie, for example, that you are feeling daunted by then don’t be afraid to just be up front and tell them. You’ll be amazed how seriously devoted some lingerie shop assistants can become once they’ve been given a mission!
The lingerie shop assistant who smiles is a bonus of course! And if you feel far too intimidated to tackle it alone, then take a girlfriend with you. Safety in numbers, they say. Your friend can stand guard while you do your try on’s; she can deflect the blast from any over-the-top peskiness at the first sign of infiltration, leaving you to put your own boobs into the bra cups… thank you very much.